You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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