whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
