Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Randomize
