What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
When did angry sex become our thing?
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Randomize
