Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
Randomize
