Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
