Whoa Z and x make the same sound
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
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