if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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