Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize
