you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me
that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
