Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize
