we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
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