I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Damn victory sex feels great
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