oh god the rape fog is back!
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
