so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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