oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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