I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
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