Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Randomize
