Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
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