The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
She announced her abortion via fbk
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize
