The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize
