Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize
