i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
