i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
