What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
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