just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
