D3 body, D1 cock
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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