there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Randomize
