the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
