i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
He better not be in your backpack
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Randomize