i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
Randomize
