I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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