were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
