Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Randomize
