Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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