He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Randomize
