The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
