I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
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