Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
bring money and cleavage
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Randomize
