Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
We're too hungover to prance.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Randomize