i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Randomize