Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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