these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
