That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
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