Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
So many bounce houses so little time
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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