never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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