scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
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