You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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