I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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