Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
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